Excerpt from my journal, 30th of March 2012

As I mentioned in the page "Writings from my journal before I started my blog" I will publish some of my journal entries that I wrote throughout my experience, but it's too long to publish on the one page so will publish here every now and then.

This is from the 30th of March 2012.

Everything feels so surreal still.
I'm having an out of body experience when I hear words as:

Forensic examination
DNA samples
Penile swab
Victim
Arrested
Crime scene
Counselling
Statement
STI screening
Bailed
Court
Trial
Police
Therapy

Worst of all:

RAPED.

I hate the word.
HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE


Later..

Sometimes I fear I will get addited, to alcohol, prescription drugs, or recreational drugs. Sometimes it's the ONLY way to numb the pain.

I could be weak enough.

Later still..

Screw HIM